Siege and Destruction of Jerusalem

Though an army encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; though war arise against me, yet I will be confident. Psalm 27:3

My favorite allegory is Hinds Feet on High Places by Hannah Hurnard. It is a Christian classic telling the story of a young shepherdess named Little Much Afraid. Her name could be mine.

Past

I am not afraid of trying new activities: snow skiing, scuba diving, horseback riding, and I think one day I will give skydiving a jump. Over these adventures I have a modicum of control. However, there are things I face that leave me quaking in my boots, or send me running for the exit at WalMart rather than face a confrontation. On the outside you might not see it, but trust me on the inside I am a bowl of yellow Jello.

Present

The Psalmist is not me. I long to be fearless. I yearn for confidence. As a young teenager, my family moved from one small Southern town to another. Already awkward and average, I found myself face to face with thirty new self-absorbed teens sitting in a classroom as I stood before the class and our teacher introduced the “new kid on the block.” I wanted the earth to open and swallow me. I prayed for a rapture.

A Heart Full with Dread

The mortification I felt, came from seeing 29 students slump in their seats when the teacher asked, for “a volunteer to show the new student around the school,” was sickening. My heart filled with dread and what little confidence I had evaporated until in the back of the classroom a skinny, beauty with a jet black, shiny mane of long, straight hair raised her hand and enthusiastically exclaimed “I will!” for all to hear. I had a friend!!

Hope was found! A bit of fear dissolved and my blinking back fear’s tears morphed into a smile of relief. She did not know it, but in this frozen moment in time, I knew she had a friend for LIFE! I would have and still would give my life for her, just for this one act of kindness. Her willingness to stand beside this new, shy kid, gave my timid soul strength to face the rest of the day. I lost my trepidation and gained a new found confidence with this sweet guide beside me.

Friendship as strong as an anchor

Even today, our friendship is as strong as an anchor.

We have weathered many storms together: divorce, death, disappointment, and discouragement. We have shared all of life’s joys and milestones. She was to me like the Guide who helped Little Much Afraid grow in confidence and courage. Confidence builds courage. Courage erases fear and allows us to stand in the face of hostility and uncertainty.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Future

My word for this year is fearless. I am not fearless. Today, there are relationships that can feel like armies encamped against and at war with me. I wish it were not so. I desire to live in peace with all men. (Romans 12:18) God alone can give me wisdom and courage. This courage has come from Hebrews 6:12 which reminds me our battles are NOT with flesh and blood! It is with the enemy who simply uses flesh and blood (people) to tie me up in knots and keep me focused on everything except what the Lord has called me to do: “be still, be quiet, and see the salvation of the Lord!” (Exodus 14:13-14)

My Prayer

May our prayer today be: “Lord, With you as my Guide, ‘though an army encamp against me, my heart will not fear, though war rise against me, yet will I be confident.’ It is You Alone oh God I trust! “ Then, may we keep our eyes on Him as Peter did when he walked on the water. (Matthew 14:22-33)

Climbing out of the boat into choppy waters,

Yvonne Jones

Becoming Fearless

https://youtu.be/1KtIF-6ZHOw
Army of the Lord, Acapella

For further reading from earlier posts:
https://www.treadingwatertiljesuscomes.com/2016/06/20/hebrews-136-big-faith-little-fear/